From White Boys of the Month to Linda Belcher, Thank God for TV Boyfriends
On this Ash Wednesday, we present our definitive list
If Valentine’s Day was a day dedicated to passionate crushes or deep longing, it would not be in February, the coldest, darkest, shortest month of the year. February is about hunkering down, it’s about stability, a crock pot full of potato soup, half of which you section off in a plastic baggy and save in the freezer. February is about boyfriends.
A boyfriend doesn’t have to be a boy, it doesn’t even have to be a sentient being. A boyfriend is an idea. A solid rock you can count on. Something you feel held by. Something that feels like home to you.
We asked the experts (experts being gracious writers we admire, friends we forced to participate and our lovely readers) to share their favorite TV boyfriends. TV is filled with hotties to make even the most prudish go feral, but that isn’t the ask here. We want BOYFRIENDS. The characters who would bail you out of jail, hold you when you cried, take a bullet for you, tell you, “You look absolutely fire, Pookie!" This list could go on forever and maybe we’ll do a part two next year, but for now, here’s what you/we said:
Lance, The Other Two
From his very first dab, I knew that The Other Two's Lance (Josh Segarra) would be hard to ignore. He's not just the ideal man, but the ideal boyfriend — funny, kind-hearted, always trying to invent a crazy new kind of shoe or outfit. His gentle exuberance and lop-sided smirk alongside Segarra's knack for comedic timing made him one of the most swoonworthy bfs of the modern sitcom era. — Fran Hoepfner of
Seth Cohen, The OC
I have actually tried to come up with a more age-appropriate answer to this question, but I cannot stop thinking about Seth Cohen. He wasn't even age-appropriate for me at the time of The OC's airing—I was in my 20s, and he was technically a teen character, though I hasten to add that he was played by Adam Brody, who is only four years younger than I and the age of my current partner. Those legal caveats aside, he was such a revelation at the time. He was like no teen show heartthrob before him. I know lots of girls swooned over him, but he felt like a guy you might really know, who might be your own personal discovery. He was cute, but that was beside the point. He was smart, and dorky, and sensitive. He had good taste in music (Death Cab for Cutie) and books (Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs). He set the template for the kind of guy I would begin dating in my 20s and 30s after a broken engagement, and, god knows, I would find that this kind of guy had his own kinds of pitfalls. (My playlists are littered with great recommendations from emotionally immature men with deceptively good taste in literature.) But I still miss Seth Cohen, and wonder what he might be up to now. — Jennifer Keishin Armstrong of
(check out Jennifer’s latest book on the making of Mean Girls and our Q&A with her)Dylan McKay, Beverly Hills, 90210
The one and only Dylan McKay will forever and always be my TV boyfriend. Was he toxic at times? Absolutely. Do I want our broken pieces to fit together like Dylan and Kelly do? Also absolutely. As I've written on TeenDramaWhore, I still dream about him and his portrayer, the late Luke Perry. My love may be unrequited, but this is one crush I'm never giving up. — Shari Weiss of
(Twitter: @sizzlemaker, Instagram/Threads: @teendramawhore)Mickey Haller, The Lincoln Lawyer
My current celebrity crush is Manuel Garcia-Rulfo. Besides being TV’s top lawyer (at least in my eyes!), he’s super sexy and sounds like a gem of a human. My readers have submitted some intel about him which have included sentiments about him such as:
“He has good energy on set. Vibes seemed right.”
“Manuel is the nicest most gracious person in the world. He loves to play ping pong and eat meals with the crew. Super down to earth and good hearted.”
“So sweet and charismatic!”
And if those glowing endorsements weren’t enough confirmation of my adoration for Manuel, he seems like a great dad on his show The Lincoln Lawyer. Love that! — Deux Moi, legend, curator of pop culture.
Gregory Eddie, Abbott Elementary
No one has ever said anything more romantic on television than “I take all your recommendations seriously. I want to know why you like stuff.” And Tyler James Williams said it like a throw away line! I’m sorry, Jim Halpert who?? — Rachel
Elliot Stabler, Law and Order: SVU
The most obvious internet boyfriend – nay, internet husband – has to be Detective Elliot Stabler from Law and Order SVU fame, now Organized Crime. As I was describing this prompt to my real-life boyfriend, my obsession with Stabler shone through. My heart rate rose when describing scenes like the one where he and his wife (RIP Kathy) reunite after a break in their marriage, and another where he is wretched by a car accident his wife and Olivia were in, threatening the life of his unborn child. He's the definition of a "Daddy," (ew, but true) evidenced by his five kids. He's tough but fair, a die-hard advocate for his family, in incredible shape (even now in his 60's), and has spent 25 hard-earned years earning his rightful title as internet boyfriend. — Sarah Riley, Mallika’s former roommate and friend who she watched a combined total of more than 2,000 hours of SVU with, according to some calculations
Linda Belcher, Bob’s Burgers
In literal terms, Troy Barnes (Community) or Stan Rizzo (Mad Men). Two formerly fratty guys who grow in wonderfully unexpected and tender ways. But also, Linda Belcher! I think she would take care of me like one of her little porcelain babies. — Chrisinda Lynch of Clean Takes on Soapy Fashion
Gary Walsh, Veep
Veep is one the most tragic shows to ever grace our screens. The mirror-holding to American politics aside, the most tragic hero on that show is Tony Hale’s Gary. He might just be top of mind given the insane Beyoncé commercial (where he revived his role as emasculated sidekick—his words not mine), but Gary is the best boyfriend to Selina Meyer, even though they never made their relationship official. Gary would take a bullet for Selina (essentially he does) and even after the most heartbreaking series finale storyline, Gary would’ve taken more shit from her if that meant being close to Selina, which makes him—in my opinion—the best TV boyfriend and I just want better for him! — Moises Mendez, our real life boyfriend (jk, unless…) and internet culture reporter extraordinaire at Time.
Charlie Black, The Morning Show
Do not get it twisted, Charlie Black makes a god awful fiancé, but a boyfriend to Alex Cooper? His devotion knows no bounds! He literally started the #MeToo movement in broadcast for this woman. In a similar vein to Gary Walsh, I think he would take a bullet for her no matter how heinously she behaves towards him or the human race. And that’s the kind of man I want in my corner (assuming I am Alex Cooper in this scenario and not one of the little nobodies he tries to marry out of sheer loneliness and unrequited love) — Rachel
Peter Kavinsky, To All the Boys I’ve Loved trilogy
Peter Kavinsky is my all-star white boyfriend. Not Noah Centineo, to be clear — I don't even know who that is. I am in love with the fictional character Peter Kavinsky. Remember when Lara Jean lied about her college admissions and the first thing he asked was "are you okay?" They know the bar is in hell, and they delivered with a vengeance. I can't even be mad. Yeah, that's my white man. Stay mad. — Steffi Cao of
Ben Wyatt, Parks and Recreation
Ben Wyatt from Parks and Recreation, an uptight failure who loves his job and the people around him though consistently battling depression, is my forever boyfriend. His vows with Leslie Knope, "I love you and I like you?!" Please. I said that to my husband at our REAL WEDDING. Even if Ben wasn't so meaningful to me as a character, I imprinted on Adam Scott in high school and I'll never let him go. Those big brown eyes and that tiny mouth ... Yes! Whatever you say, handsome! — Kelsey Weekman of
(Twitter: kelsaywhat)Spike, Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"They asked me: Do you love her to death? Speak of her over my grave and watch how she brings me back to life."
This internet-famous line of poetry, often misattributed to Palestinian poet Mahmoud Darwish, could easily have been spoken by Spike, the punk vampire heartthrob of Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
Spike (James Marsters) established his romantic potential through Tim Burton's Sid and Nancy his undead romance with Drusilla (Juliet Landau). But he stepped into the spotlight as the perky blonde Slayer's superior love interest. Though Spike and Buffy (Sarah Michelle Gellar)’s first kiss was under the influence of a spell, his dark, mercurial appeal soon took on a magic all of its own. Showrunner Joss Whedon grew to resent Spike for his Luciferian way of exceeding his creator's intended purpose as a disposable villain. In an act of puritanism, of hating immodest and non-normative pleasures, Whedon punished the audience and Buffy for being enthralled by Spike by having him inflict a horrible violation on our heroine. Only, of course, to give him a mealy-mouthed Christianish redemption that defeated the purpose.
Spike's essential appeal is that he's vulnerable, often pathetically so, because he knows to love is to leave your heart open, ripe to be torn out. Love is painful, hellish, humiliating, but what are you going to do, run away?
"I may be love's bitch," Spike once said, "but at least I'm man enough to admit it." — Emily Lever, our friend / fabulous writer as seen in The Masters Review, Jewish Currents and Popula
Max Medina, Gilmore Girls
It's Max, Maaaaaaaaax Medina. Listen...I know the world loves to hate on this Lorelai love interest, but my rewatch had me labeling Mr. Medina as my crush of the week. Maybe because the bar is so low due to my forever-cursed love life but if Max Medina showed up to talk to me at a coffee shop, I would melt into the floor. He's a romantic, a cutie, he's funny, and he makes it clear to Lorelai that he is obsessed with her. If a man gave me a copy of “Swann’s Way,” I would simply not read it, BUT if he wore twead two-piece suits and called me a “beautiful woman” with that slight New York accent, I would at least Google the synopsis. Yes, the proposal was way too premature but 1,000 yellow daisies??? People thought it was excessive, but it’s a movie reference, duh! That is Lorelai and you can't deny that (even though everyone tries to). — Sam Keeler, photographer, friend, trademarker of this newsletter title
Troy Bolton, High School Musical trilogy
After seeing Cats on Broadway at far too young an age, I became very attached to the fantasy that the perfect man would fall in love with me if only he could hear me sing. Just give me a chance to enchant his heart through the power of song! I was obsessed with this idea and no one could convince me it wasn’t possible.
Then, in 2006, when I was 11 years old, It happened — just not to me.
Two teens, brought together by chance and a karaoke machine (and parents rich enough to take them to a ski resort): Troy Bolton heard Gabriella Montez sing together for the first time, and the rest is history.
Believing in a world where a popular jock would even consider bailing on hoops with the boys to sing love songs with the theater kids felt like waiting to see Bigfoot walk out of the woods and into a Dennys until Zac Efron and his mop top head made his Disney Channel movie debut.
Troy Bolton is the boyfriend archetype the modern annoying art girl needed to see represented. He is the delusion that dominated my standards for men until far too late into young adulthood. Most importantly, he shattered the cringe ceiling for a new generation of young people ready to conflate their love of the stage with the love of their life, and I think there’s something really beautiful about that. — Jacque Nelson, comedianne (Instagram: @jacquelu44; Monthly comedy show: @jointcustody_comedy)
Danny Castellano, The Mindy Project
I know it's a hot take — but my favorite TV boyfriend was Danny Castellano but caveat, he was the best before he was actually her boyfriend. As her non-boyfriend, Danny was the BEST boyfriend. Did we forget when he signed up to be her personal trainer and then gave her reassurance about her body? Did we forget when he remembered the song she used to play at the office all the time then gave us one of the best Secret Santa/ tv dances of all time (play try again by Aaliyah). Let's try to remember Danny before he was the absolute worst. We had good times too. — Anshu Gupta of
Steve Harrington, Stranger Things
No one makes me more feral than Steve Harrington. Maybe Hal from Malcolm in the Middle but that’s HUSBAND MATERIAL. In season one, he’s introduced as a shallow lothario, but his charm and billowing hair ooze out of the screen — likely saving him from a similar fate as our girl Barb (RIP!) He starts off the show as a bad boyfriend, but ends the last season as our collective 80’s action babygirl/sitter. — Julia Cramer, friend, our number one leaderboard champion
Josh Lyman, The West Wing
West Wing’s resident baby girl and deputy chief of staff of boyish charm: Josh Lyman, the people’s boyfriend.
Verbal sparing is my kink and Josh brings the banter. Full of wit, charm, and wild enunciation, Josh is not a golden retriever boyfriend, but a border collie. Incredibly intelligent, hyperactive, eager for praise, and always yelling.
Though he’s fumbled many amazing women, Josh and Donna’s will-they-won’t-they changed me on a molecular level, and let’s face it, suits as a concept were developed to showcase Josh Lyman’s butt. Those on Lemon-lyman.com knew it, and so should you.
Janel Moloney said, “The first thing they should do when they start cloning people is clone Brad Whitford. I think it should be a constitutional right that all women have one.” I would like to sign up. — Nikki Boliaux, friend, video editing savant, catch her work on Max’s Telemarketers
Adam, Girls
Hannah Horvath is a hard girlie to root for. Many of us (me) squirm when we find ourselves relating to her because that would mean we, too, are insufferable. But when Hannah returned from her failed MFA attempt in Iowa to the Greenpoint apartment she once shared with her boyfriend Adam, only to discover he’d found a new, hotter girlfriend, I felt an intense connection to her pain. Their relationship throughout season three of Girls, in all its highs and lows, felt not only supremely real to me, but a little like home. When Hannah realized the person who she’d developed such a unique connection to — who despite his eccentricities had taken care of her when she couldn’t take care of herself, who after finding out she had been in a minor car accident left his Broadway play rehearsal to ride his motorcycle all the way to Michigan — now belonged to someone else, I could imagine exactly what that felt like. I could imagine the heartbreak of losing Adam Driver.
Adam was not a perfect boyfriend. Maybe it was just in contrast to Hannah’s gremlin tendencies that he came out frequently looking like a decent human being. He starts as a big-eared freak replacing his drinking addiction with a lot of kinky, often degrading sex and later on, he becomes a nightmare scenario boyfriend: the one who breaks up with you and starts dating your best friend. But I don’t care! I want him to twirl me around a dance floor with those giant hands! — Rachel
Chloe Sullivan, Smallville / Lexi Grey, Grey’s Anatomy
Okay, Chloe Sullivan and Lexi Grey were TV boyfriend for my lil non-out gay heart because they are both an approachable kind of cute. In their respective shows no one is out here goo goo ga-ing over them (except maybe mark obvi), but they are attractive in their own rights. And how hot was it when Lexi said to mark “so, teach me. Teach me.” Girl knows what she wants and is begging this man to TEACH HER while respectively undressing. She also had every leading man on that show at some point (except Owen because gross). She was also so smart (lexipedia), came off innocent but also like she didn’t fuck around, and didn’t let this man ruin her life and take her down with him when he chose Sloan over her.
For Chloe, again a Cutie who was approachable and SO smart. Girl was figuring out all the town weirdness and investigating from a high school classroom, while also protecting Clark’s secret identity just because, above all else, she cared about him as a friend. All I know is no one else had Clark’s back like Chloe. While she watched the love of her life fawn after the love of His life (aka Lana Lang). And, it takes an awful LOT to tell your feelings to someone while they are in a dazed fever and have them say the other girls name and not remember and then you keep that secret. Chloe was a boys girl and also a girls girl and we should all strive to be like Chloe Sullivan (but not Allison Mack cause she’s a convicted criminal). — Kyriel Butler, roommate, friend, frequent watcher of Reba
Karen, The Office / Ann Perkins, Parks and Recreation
It goes against the grain to say that I preferred Karen Fillipelli to Pam as a love interest for Jim in The Office. Though I had a crush on Jenna Fischer in addition to Rashida. — Steve Goldberg, reader
Rachel’s note: Ok but let’s be honest Leslie Knope is the boyfriend (to Ann Perkins specifically) we all want and deserve. Showering her with constant compliments and baked goods?? So what, she made her watch all eight Harry Potter movies! Ann was ungrateful!
Nick Miller, New Girl
Gotta go Nick Miller from New Girl just cause he was so so formative for me lol — Ali Golub, reader
Spencer Reid, Criminal Minds
Dr. Spencer Reid, a supervisory special agent with the behavioral analysis unit on Criminal Minds, is in line with the Seth Cohen archetype — a.k.a. exactly my type. From his awkward flirting with a Hollywood actress/victim played by Amber Heard (…yes) to so sweetly taking care of his schizophrenic mother played by Jane Lynch, he quickly became my TV boyfriend, no matter how much he tried to give us the ick with that run. I will also one day do a close reading of one of the Spencer/Cat (Aubrey Plaza) scenes, which are somehow some of the steamiest scenes on television despite her being a serial killer threatening his life and them hardly even touching. They did my boy dirty in the love department and he needs a second chance, which is another reason for him to greatly improve my quality of life by returning to the Criminal Minds reboot. —Mallika
Oz, Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Emily’s ode to Spike is flawless, and she’s right. He’s the perfect simp in bad boy’s clothing, a Rottweiler who’d roll over and let you pet its belly.1 But I simply must add another Buffy name to this list because no TV Boyfriend has touched my heart quite like Oz has. Seth Green plays the absolute perfect boyfriend, and that is Oz’s job, boyfriend. Poor sweet Willow spent years of her life pining over Xander who never returned her love and to watch her be SEEN the way Oz sees her makes me well up with tears. He’s quiet but never passive about his feelings for her. He might have a furry little problem and the writers did him sooo dirty in season four, but he is the best boyfriend in Buffy (I mean it’s not even close) and might be my favorite TV boyfriend of all time tied only with Lane’s Dave Rygalski on Gilmore Girls. — Rachel
Shawn Hunter, Boy Meets World
Alright, I have too many TV boyfriends. Sue me! But speaking of sensitive sweeties whose vulnerable moments make me cry cry cry… Shawn Hunter was crushworthy, sure. Those blue eyes, that middle part! But more importantly he was a loyal friend who wasn’t afraid to be vulnerable. He was emotionally mature well beyond his years and this made him the absolute best boyfriend. He was Angela’s boyfriend, he was Cory‘s boyfriend, he was Topanga’s boyfriend and he was MY boyfriend. — Rachel
Honorable Mentions:
Steve, Sex and the City
Stiles, Teen Wolf
Pacey, Dawson’s Creek
Ravi, iZombie
Jason Mendoza, The Good Place
Patrick, Schitts Creek
Steve Hale, Full House
Roy Kent, Ted Lasso
That his nickname “William the Bloody” originated from his “bloody” terrible poetry is just… chef’s kiss.
This is so, so good! Lance is so perfect, I'm mad at myself for not thinking of that one. And Dylan McKay 4-eva.