Our 15 TV Predictions for 2024
Yes, some of these are unhinged. But imagine if we're right?
Happy New Year, YWSW-ers! You may be thinking, don’t predictions usually come out at the end of the year and not once New Year’s Eve has passed? And you are right but you’re also talking to two gals who are still discussing Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Gossip Girl in 2024. We’re always a little behind and that’s our charm!!!
Please enjoy our 15 predictions for what’s to come in the wild world of TV in 2024.
Euphoria will get canceled
Ladies and gentleman, it’s time. If The OC stars were over playing teenagers by season three imagine how insufferable stars like Jacob Elordi will be if they have to play high schoolers for a fourth season, which, at the rate it’s going, would air in like 2030. We’re predicting the announcement that season three will be the last for Rue and the crew… if there is even a season three.
Mindhunter will be revived
Jonathan Groff is busy merrily rolling along on Broadway but once he’s done, we’re predicting he’ll be part of another revival: Netflix’s show about the FBI team who started criminal profiling in the late 1970s via interviews with serial killers. According to David Fincher, the show’s director and executive producer, the show was too expensive for Netflix to continue onto a third season. Excuse us? We’ve seen Stranger Things!!! We’ve seen The Crown!!! We haven’t seen The Sandman but the trailer looked expensive!!! We know Netflix can open up its purse strings and in 2024 we predict it’ll remember how much people love Groff and anything to do with serial killers.
Leighton Meester and Adam Brody will get their flowers
It's hard to explain how much it would mean to us if teen drama royalty, real-life couple Leighton Meester and Adam Brody were cast in the upcoming season of White Lotus. It would be our Joker, our Roman Empire, our beacon of hope in what is sure to be a shit-fire year. But rumors of that cast are already swirling and there have been no whispers of these two. So in the same vein, our prediction is that these two will get big parts in a TV series, pulling Leighton Meester out of the depths of Christmas movies no one can remember the name of and prompting someone to write a piece for The Daily Beast or Vulture about how we really should have appreciated Brody’s 2020 movie The Kid Detective more. The stage is set for Brody: We got a glimpse of his comeback in Fleishman Is in Trouble and we’ll probably be hearing a lot more about American Fiction, which he has a small part in. Meester needs our help. Why is the clear star of Gossip Girl getting her sitcoms canceled left and right while Blake Lively gets to sit next to Taylor Swift at Chiefs’ games? Hmmmm? No shade to Blake, but we must right this wrong. Producers, hear our pleas!
Netflix will get into live sports
We famously do not care about sports unless Zendaya and Mike Faist are playing them or we’re watching Friday Night Lights. Mallika’s fiancé watches quite a lot of sports and sometimes tries tell her that they can be just as exciting as a well-written drama, to which she says “ok but this is Barbie’s dreamhouse, not Ken’s dreamhouse” and turns back on Gilmore Girls. But Netflix is admitting more and more that it can’t rely solely on its original content, most recently via a deal with Disney that will allow the streamer to show 14 different series from ABC, Fox, FX and ESPN for 18 months. Netflix has had its fair share of sports-related successes from Cheer to the recent David Beckham documentary. Our prediction is that the ESPN content does well for Netflix and it finally dips into live sports like Hulu has. If we’re right, this better not push back the final season of Stranger Things. We’ll be writing the newsletter about that finale from a nursing home at this rate.
Ayo Edebiri and Pedro Pascal will lead a miniseries
There is a producer somewhere out there realizing that these two are simply too likable to not be cast in something together. If people are freaking out over Sydney Sweeney explaining the term Mother to Glen Powell, imagine how much fun people would have with Edebiri explaining young-person slang to Pascal while they play with puppies or take a lie detector test. The power of these two… it’s bubbling… it’s brewing. Together, they’re going to take over the world, or at least get an Emmy. If you’re thinking, wait, isn’t Edebiri supposed to be teaming up with Paul Mescal for a rom com? We’re not counting this out, but we’re predicting a Mescal return to the small screen too in the form of a period piece.
It’s the year of Nicola Coughlan
In the words of a text Rachel once sent Mallika, Nicola Coughlan is “the only celebrity actress with a fucking soul.” We can’t fact check that but we can predict a big, big year for her. She never fully got all the appreciation she deserved for Derry Girls but between the next season of Bridgerton and her upcoming miniseries Big Mood, she’s going to get lots more than a few laughs in Barbie.
Gypsy Rose Blanchard is getting a reality TV show
Gypsy Rose Blanchard — famous for convincing her boyfriend to kill her mom after suffering years of abuse at her mom’s hands — may not have gotten to meet Taylor Swift at a recent Chiefs’ game, but we do predict she’s getting a reality show. People (us included) were obsessed with this story before Hulu turned it into miniseries The Act in 2019, and now that Blachard is free and posting selfies, someone is 100% swooping in on the chance to document her post-prison years. As you know, we’re not the biggest reality TV girlies, but better her than George Santos, that’s for sure.
Sterling K. Brown will guest star on Abbott Elementary
We’re always hearing about how Ava has blackmail on the superintendent but have we met said superintendent? No! (Well, we think no, it could be a case of our TV amnesia but that’s none of our business). Brown would be a perfect guest star especially in a role where he gets to be a little saucy and domineering. Just imagine him and Gregory going toe to toe (or hoe to hoe given Gregory’s gardening background). Between Brooklyn Nine-Nine and Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, at this point we know that Brown’s presence elevates any TV show and we are betting he’ll make our TV dreams come true this year.
Jack Coleman will play Alex Murdaugh
We’re very surprised there hasn’t been a Murdaugh murder miniseries yet, but this is the year. We guess Alex Murdaugh, the powerful lawyer who murdered his wife and son, will be played by none other than Jack Coleman, best known for his role in the famed 2006 movie Cow Belles in which Aly & AJ have to save the day at their dad’s dairy company (oh and Heroes). But we’re going a step further and predicting an Emmy nom AND win for Coleman as Murdaugh. The man has had two-to-five episode stints as someone’s slightly sinister father in ENOUGH TV shows. It’s time for him to truly shine as the most sinister of sinister fathers. He better start working with a dialect coach on that wild South Carolina accent because we are not fucking around.
Heroes will make a comeback
Speaking of Jack Coleman, the show everyone rewatches this year à la Suits and Ugly Betty will be Heroes. It not only has nostalgia, it also has Milo Ventimiglia, and that will take you far. Plus, people (us) are getting so extra sick of Marvel. They (us) are looking elsewhere for their superpower fix. You can stream it on Peacock if you trust us and want to get a head start. 30 Rock is also on the precipice of a rewatch boom.
Dan Schneider will actually get his ass handed to him
Dan Schneider — who was a legendary kids’ television figure at Nickelodeon for 25 years and brought us hits like The Amanda Show, Drake & Josh, Zoey 101 and iCarly — has long faced allegations of controlling, abusive behavior on set. But he hasn’t actually faced many repercussions; the 2021 New York Times profile of Schneider that outlined a lot of the allegations was also about his hope for a return to television. But the stars of Nick are now free, talking about their mistreatment in books, podcasts and on social media. It’s time for Schneider to get his ass handed to him and we predict this is the year it will finally happen.
Ned’s Declassified Podcast will get the boot
Everything we know about the cast of Ned’s Declassified School Survival Guide has been against our will. We went to find one example and the first TikTok is literally titled “Recapping the Ned’s Declassified Cast’s First B.J.” Why???? We want nothing but the best for these three, but 2024 will be the end of the podcast. This is less a prediction and more of a manifestation. Enough! Please!
Aaron Taylor Johnson will be in critically-acclaimed TV show (and get divorced)
Aaron Taylor Johnson and Jeremy Allen White are actually two different people even though their three-prong names look similar if you squint really hard. And that’s enough of a correlation for us. We’re predicting a big role in a soon-to-be major TV show for Taylor Johnson, that will be followed by an Allen-White-style divorce from his wife — a relationship that started in 2009 when Taylor Johnson was 19 and his now-wife, then-director was 42. One TV reboot we would not be mad about is an Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging series… (you might say, hey, that won’t win ATJ the Emmy and you may be right but let’s not forget that Rupert Grint deemed this movie a feminist cult classic and he was so right).
There will be a Jeffrey Epstein miniseries
Suspicious this one has taken so long, actually… Possibly because it would be hard to find someone in Hollywood who doesn’t have a, shall we say, conflict of interest? Well, the list drops TOMORROW, baby, so it’s time to check it twice and find out who gets coal (real bad press) in their stocking this year and who gets presents (possible role in a Hulu miniseries). Ok Christmas is over and this doesn’t work but you get the point.
Rumors will swirl of Hunger Games TV series
If there’s one thing we know about Hollywood, it’s that they hate original ideas. As we know, there are television shows in the works for both Harry Potter and Twilight, despite us absolutely trying our best to stop the HP one earlier this year. With the success of Hunger Games prequel movie The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes this year, it’s only a matter of time before we start hearing that producers are plotting how to squeeze every last bit of juice out of that franchise. A Hunger Games show could actually be a great gateway to comment on tyrannical governments and the follies of war etc etc. So we aren’t entirely mad about the idea, but the second we hear the words “love triangle” we’re tapping out.
